Contraction Master

In an attempt to get a little more shut-eye after Isla woke up at 5.16am this morning I fed her my iPhone. I decided with only two teeth the most harm she could do would be a severe suck. Every so often I would open one eye to see her scrolling through apps – isn’t it frightening that babies are already better at technology than your average grandparent? Anyway, I digress. In her scrolling Isla managed to open the Contraction Master app we used when I was in labour with her. I didn’t want her to delete the record I had of those intense hours with Col so I grabbed the phone back to have a look. It is one of those Apps that ‘does what it says on the tin’. It records the times and intensities of your contractions and creates graphs of the trends so you can see how you are progressing through. After Evie’s birth I was aware I have quick labours so it wasn’t long before I handed my phone over to Col to be master of the Contraction Master as I was no longer capable of anything other than getting on through the waves of pain. So he was recording my squeals as they came and went. As I read through the charts this morning I thought ‘what a bloody cheek?’. I noted that at 23.11 on 23/12/11 Colin noted my contraction as mild. Mild. I gave birth about 40 minutes later. I was mock livid with him this morning as I read through the rest of it. Mild, Mild, Medium….he had no idea. He always thought me a drama queen but I would love to have seen him deliver a child. That aside though my memory of Colin at the births of our babies was that he was emotional, ecstatic, overwhelmed and instantly in love at both of them. It makes me sad that aside from two random midwives in St Georges in Tooting, London, I am the only living being with those memories and stories from those two Very Important Days in our little Campbell clan’s story.

2 Replies to “Contraction Master”

  1. When I was a little girl I had a best friend who I was always on adventures with. We would go out alone and run around the neighbourhood playing silly games and making each other laugh. She was a real monkey and would inevitably goad me into doing things that were Not A Good Idea for comic effect. There was always mischief afoot… I remember having so much fun with her, and feeling so free and independent (though we were probably always within half a mile of one of our houses). Then we became teenagers and went our separate ways, as kids do… I still knew her but we weren’t close any more. When I was 22, I was on holiday when I got a phone call from my mum to tell me this girl had been killed in a car accident, a moment I remember very very vividly. I don’t in any way wish to compare this to how you feel about Colin’s death, because I hadn’t been close to her for a long time and of course it’s not the same thing at all. But I really strongly relate to that feeling of having special memories that you shared with one person only, and that person is no longer around to discuss them with. Suddenly the memories feel really fragile, and when you focus on it, it’s a very odd, scary feeling. I think it’s wonderful that you are writing so much at the moment and can put many of your memories down in words, whether on the blog or privately. You’re a talented writer too, and it will mean a lot to you and others to be able to read it all back in years to come. Much love from me as always and keep updating.

    1. Precarious things memories. I feel like I could reinvent stories from those labours to paint myself as the champion of giverbirther champions (which of course I was – gas and air only/water births yadayadayada) because there is no one here to tell the other side of the tale (angry/screaming midwives worst nightmare). Love you too H. X

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